Thoughts about Life

As the summer winds down (crazy, right?!) it is almost impossible to not feel a bit anxious about life's next stage. Ever since university --or when I moved from Toronto to the States for university-- I have felt a bit nomadic, without a place to call my own home. Now, I know that deep down this is not true and that I do, in fact, have multiple options for setting down roots. I visit my family and friends in the GTA, in Tennessee, and in Virginia multiple times per year. And I really have been trying to network and connect in places like Denver or DC where I can see myself working for at least a few years.

However... I am still a wanderer, a lover of travel and observance, and of experiencing different people and cultures in a way that's vastly different and off-the-beaten-path. And although I am trying hard to "settle" somewhere and get a few years of serious work experience, I can't help but step back and ask myself WHAT IN GOD'S NAME ARE YOU DOING?! I don't want a mortgage! I don't want car payments and getting stuck in traffic every day! If the purpose of life is to continually learn and share love, why would I want to "work for the man" (man being a corporation) when I could just spend a few years abroad? 

Well, my dilemma (apart from the fact that my entire family moved to the US, and if I leave for over a year I will lose my permanent resident status here!) is that I crave community. I crave the opportunity to KNOW and BE KNOWN by a consistent set of people-- ones who can encourage, inspire, and support each other as we all try to find meaning and purpose in this life. One of the huge problems I had with the crowd in Vail, Colorado, this past winter was that people didn't care about anything other than themselves. It was a very "live for the moment" mentality, which, in my opinion, doesn't contribute one bit to society in a positive way, other than the revenue from all the DUI charges and medical/retail marijuana taxes (that go to education, ironically). Yes, I did learn a lot about myself this winter. I also managed to spend some time improving my skiing skills, which were quite lacking when I first reached the slopes! And I made a few friends with whom I was able to connect with during and after work. 

But after moving several times after coming "home" after my year in China, all I feel is restless. Restless to start a career but apprehensive about how to go about achieving my dreams and not compromising my heart's desire to travel and connect with people, and to continuously teach and learn along the way.

If you have any advice or similar sentiments, I'd love to hear your thoughts. My email is cait.kooistra (at) gmail (dot) com. 

Big Sur, CA

Driving from L.A. to San Francisco and camping along the Pacific Coast Highway...
Definitely some of the most beautiful coastal scenery I've seen in my life.
Traveled with Chase, a coworker from Splendido at the Chateau in Beaver Creek.
June 2014.

And sometimes, all you can do is focus on yourself and how to be a better person. No giving excuses, no blaming others, no wallowing in would'ves and could'ves... Just making a conscious decision to choose joy and thankfulness over dwelling on the negatives. Life is too short to be unhappy, and it's definitely too short to NOT be proactive about the important things.

Family Picture

We went up to Barrie, Ontario, for my grandma's wedding last week. Since we don't always have all 5 of us together, we took a family photo.

Thanks to Jen Weening for the awesome photography skills! :)

Today's Meditation and Reflection

Los Angeles

After a sweltering night in Bakersfield, CA, where it was 36*C at nine o'clock at night, we happily headed to Los Angeles. (Or, as Bugs Bunny says, "Los Ahn-gul-ees").

Trying to find an affordable hostel or airbnb accommodation in LA was no easy feat. Thankfully Chase got in touch with an old high school friend who lives in Hollywood Hills! We were able to stay at his eclectically-decorated bachelor pad with views of the HOLLYWOOD sign. Click below to see my Los Angeles album on flickr.

Here is a link to my flickr page

“When life is about caring for the orchard, rather than picking the apples, you get more apples to eat. It is quite paradoxical, but as soon as you give up trying to make yourself happy, you are.“ 
     - Nicholas Lore, career author

SEQUOIA NATIONAL PARK

After a LONG day of driving through California farmland, we finally arrived at Sequoia.

And yes, it's as spectacular as everyone says. :)

^ Setting up: Buckeye Flat Campground

^Decided to explore a nearby foot trail... which led to lots of rapids and waterfalls!

^ Day 2: Setting up camp at Lodgepole (about an hour drive UP into the park)

^ Everything had to be locked up in a bin... all toiletries, food, anything with a scent.

Essentially, half the contents of our car had to be crammed into this box.

^ Beautiful view (unedited version of this post's first picture)

Vegas ~Part 2

^ Bellagio...

^ Dessert break for very sore legs

^ View from above-street ped-X

We sat here watching the gondolas with a couple from Sao Paulo, Brazil

^ Goodnight, Las Vegas.

Las Vegas (pt 1)

If there is one city that overdoes things, it's definitely Las Vegas. My first impression of the city: State troopers in unmarked silver pickup trucks are just dirty-- I mean, can you at least stick to the typical Charger-shaped cars? Not impressed. Second impression: FREE PARKING?! At all the casinos? Are you kidding me? This place is awesome! Third impression: Just used the toilet in the MGM Grand (where we parked)... What the heck is on the faucet? Oh, I'm just being advertised to. BY A MINI TV SCREEN ATTACHED TO THE SINK! This place is insane.

I have mixed feelings about Vegas. I mean, it's on everybody's bucket list for a reason, right? But having just visited the Grand Canyon, everything seemed a bit overwhelming and overstimulating. *Especially* the young women dressed as Victoria Secret Angels or Cabaret Dancers or whatever other risque, barely-wearing-any-clothes, so-hot-you-need-a-picture-with-her, kind of skanky "photo opp" girls you can think of. Or any other comic/movie character you can think of, really. Or the handers-out of hooker business cards. Those were interesting. Stay classy, Vegas.

What was interesting, however, was walking The Strip and seeing the inside of the famous casinos. My dreams of seeing the Bellagio (Oceans 11, anyone?) and the Mirage were fulfilled, although we just missed being able to see the "Siegfried & Roy's Secret Garden and Dolphin Habitat" at the latter. Here are some pictures from our whirlwind (I say that word a lot, don't I?) day trip to LV.

^ In the Conservatory at the Bellagio

^ The advertisement says it all.

^ At the Metropolitan, I believe

^ The famous glass flower ceiling in the Bellagio's lobby

^ A "painting" made out of living plants.

Bellagio.

Update

I have been applying for jobs, studying for the GRE (graduate school entrance exam) and trying to prepare for what comes next. It's all a bit overwhelming but I am so thankful for a great support network around me.

I've just updated my professional profile on LinkedIn. Connect with me and view my profile.